Opinion | I Cherish My Grief for the Mother I Never Expected to Have
There is grief that strangles you and grief that holds you.
Hasnain says:
Such a beautifully written essay. Who’s cutting onions in the house at this time of night?!
“That grief that strangles, versus the grief that holds — I know the difference now. I didn’t cry when my birth mother left, because my grief before was mostly made up of anger so ferocious that it just made me hate myself.
The grief I feel over the loss of Margaret levels me regularly; big floods of tears, suddenly, in the middle of the day. But at the same time, this grief is so much sweeter. Because I get to keep her. I get to miss her. The ways she took care of me, the things she taught me, the little ways that I wound up resembling her sometimes, even if she didn’t raise me.
Margaret used to tell me, “You’re so easy to love.” Somehow, now, I believe her. Her voice is in my head now, too. She gets to stay.”
Posted on 2022-05-08T11:07:05+0000